With so many self-improvement programs there are many stops and starts. We begin a practice to better our lives and then drift away from it. Maybe you start a running program, and after the initial enthusiasm wears off, one or 2 missed days turns into weeks without a single run. Or you start a gratitude […]
Category Archives: Uncategorized
Challenge the motivation myths
It’s a common myth that we need to feel motivated before we can do something. Sometimes we feel it, but often we sit around waiting for it and it never comes. As a result, many things never get done that would bring us closer to our personal and professional goals. Ideally, there is a desire […]
Coping with Disappointment
Disappointment is inevitable in life. Reality often fails to meet our expectations. Maybe you were looking forward with great anticipation to a first date. Your mind had raced ahead to fantasies of instant connection and a great romance only to meet and experience a complete lack of chemistry. Profound disappointment crashes in. You experience sadness […]
Radical Acceptance
There are times in life when it’s difficult to accept reality. It’s human nature to refuse to accept pain or close ourselves off to the aspects of reality we don’t like or want. Sometimes we secretly hope that if we refuse to accept things as they are, they will change. From a Buddhist perspective, pain […]
10 Tips for Coping with Working Remotely and Social Distancing
1. Build Structure. Lack of daily structure can be a set up for worry, anxiety and negative emotions. Create a schedule for your work days including the start and end of the workday, with set times for meals and planned breaks. Having a regular routine will help you to maintain a positive mindset, increase productivity […]
Practice Noticing When You’re Wrong: Confirmation Bias
Our thoughts are not always facts. We’re all prone to errors or systematic biases in our thinking. As a result, our processing of information biased. For example, in depression and anxiety, thinking tends to be overly negative—little attention is paid to the positive and the neutral. One overarching thinking error is confirmation bias: we selectively […]
What were your top 3 decisions of 2019?
With the end of the decade and the start of the new year, we tend to look back and assess the progress we’ve made towards our goals and set new ones. While this year-end review process has the potential to be positive and inspiring, it can also be negative and self-defeating. As a result of […]
No praise, no problem: develop your own performance standards
Everyone loves positive feedback. It feels good and often confirms your own assessment of your performance. You think you’ve done good job and now you know. When we were in school, we could use grades or the teachers’ comments as benchmarks for our performance. But there are times, in our work or personal life, where […]
Stop Commoditizing Yourself
As a clinical psychologist, I work with many successful, divorced heterosexual men in their late 40s and early 50s who are dating and looking for love. For many, it’s the first time they’ve dated in 20 or more years. If you’re like many of my clients, you probably consider your wealth and professional success your […]
Bringing the Ashram to You
Mindfulness is definitely a buzz word these days. It’s also a multi-billion dollar industry and everyone wants a piece of the action. As a result, there’s been a proliferation of mindfulness products and teachers which can be confusing for the consumer. It’s conceptually very simple. Anyone who complicates or mystifies it either doesn’t know what […]